Courts, Swipe Culture, and the Yearn for Something Real
The Bend Dating Team
The Swipe Revolution That Changed Everything
In the early 2010s, Tinder emerged from a buzzy startup incubator called Hatch Labs in West Hollywood. Spearheaded by Sean Rad and fellow co-founders, it debuted a swipe-first interface that transformed American dating into a fast-paced performance of selfies and one-liners. Suddenly, connection felt like a game, one that could be played from a couch or a bus stop, endlessly, like a digital slot machine. That shift didn’t just modernize courtship—it redefined it.¹
The Layoff Ripple: Who Gets Cut When the Swipe Slows Down
By early 2025, Match Group, headquartered in Dallas, had begun to feel the cracks. A 13% reduction in its workforce—over 300 employees, many from U.S. marketing and product teams—was announced as part of a broader restructuring push led by new CEO Spencer Rascoff.²³ These cuts weren’t just budgetary; they struck at the creative heart of platforms designed to shape how Americans pursue love. Without the minds who curated campaigns like "Designed to Be Deleted" or engineered features like swipes, the apps risked losing the emotional resonance they once had.
Tinder Slips, Hinge Soars: What the Numbers Reveal
Match Group’s Q2 2025 financials revealed troubling strain within its flagship. Tinder’s revenue fell 4% year-over-year, with paying users declining 7% to 9 million globally, most pronounced in the saturated U.S. market where critics say the magic has worn off. Concurrently, Hinge, branded as the more intentional alternative, registered a 25% surge in revenue, powered by messaging and design that tapped into younger Americans' craving for authenticity.⁴⁵
Users reflect this divide in anecdote. In Chicago, a 27-year-old woman named Sara said of Tinder: “Matches piled up, but conversations rarely deepened. Chatting became exercise choreography, all form, no feeling.” Her frustration illustrates why Hinge’s storytelling-forward format resonates more deeply with people tired of swipe fatigue.
Regulation, Trust, and the $14 Million Moment
In August 2025, Match Group agreed to pay $14 million to settle charges with the FTC over deceptive advertising and convoluted cancellation practices.⁶ It’s a modest financial blow for a multibillion-dollar company, but in a market where Americans are increasingly skeptical of platforms that monetize subscriptions instead of meaningful connection, the optics are stark. The settlement sent a clear message: goodwill, and trust, is a key currency in courting U.S. singles.⁷
Gendered Realities: Swipe Fatigue from Both Sides
The design of swipe apps has created distinct stressors for men and women in the U.S. Women often complain about the emotional drain of endless matches and superficial messaging. The phenomenon has even been given a name. A segment of users and commentators on TikTok and social media platforms speak openly about “yearning”, a longing for connection that transcends convenience or brevity.⁸⁹
Men, too, are feeling the pressure in new ways. In Los Angeles, 29-year-old Brandon deleted his apps after realizing he was sending dozens of messages with little response. “It felt like a job interview where you never get called back,” he said. The ambiguity, the constant competition, it all became a drain on emotional bandwidth.
The Yearning Countercurrent
Enter the trend of the "yearner": daters, especially younger Americans—who are rejecting casual ambiguity in favor of openness and emotional expression. They’re done playing cool; they want to show they care. Platforms are noticing. Hinge's own research found that 44% of users say an enthusiastic follow-up message is more attractive than detached aloofness, a clear signal that emotional sincerity is back in vogue. On Tinder, the new “Double Date” feature, now available in the U.S., encourages group interactions and has already boosted messaging rates and match rates among younger users.¹⁰¹¹
On TikTok, content tagged with #yearning shows people unabashedly declaring their interest, often to stand out in a culture that normalized cultural playing hard to get. As one “Yearner girl summer” video put it: the lamest move now is to pretend you don’t care. This trend, in many ways, challenges the transactional veneer that has dominated digital dating for years.
The Return to Real: Courting Offline Again
Match fatigue has real-world implications. In cities like Washington, D.C., more daters report meeting through mutual friends, local gatherings, or simple coffee runs. One Denver-based architect, Lily, described swiping as “too much effort with too little reward,” and said she preferred meeting people over brunch proofs or community yoga sessions. These moments allow for glimpses into someone's rhythm, humor, and mind—not just their best angle or one-liner.
What This Means for the Future of American Courtship
The decline in Tinder’s appeal, the rise of yearning, and the shift toward offline spontaneity all point toward one conclusion: Americans are craving substance again. Swipe culture proved that desire could be algorithmically optimized. But what people really want, genuine curiosity, emotional resonance, a spark, cannot be reduced to metrics. If Match Group and its rivals want to stay relevant, they must go beyond clicks: they must cultivate an environment where courtship and human longing aren’t obstacles to be gamified, but the beating heart of their platforms.
References
“Tinder (app) – History”, Wikipedia.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tinder_(app)“Match Group cuts 13% of workforce to cut costs”, Reuters, May 8 2025.
https://www.reuters.com/technology/tinder-parent-match-cuts-13-workforce-forecasts-revenue-above-estimates-2025-05-08/“Match to lay off 13% of staff”, TechCrunch, May 8 2025.
https://techcrunch.com/2025/05/08/match-to-lay-off-13-of-staff /“Match Group Announces Second Quarter Results”, Match Group IR, Aug 5 2025.
https://ir.mtch.com/investor-relations/news-events/news-events/news-details/2025/Match-Group-Announces-Second-Quarter-Results/“Hinge booms ... 25 percent increase in revenue ... paying users growing 18 percent”, Global Dating Insights, Aug 6 2025.
https://www.globaldatinginsights.com/featured/ai-and-hinge-drive-match-groups-turnaround-in-q2/“Match Group Agrees to Pay $14 Million ... to Resolve FTC Charges”, FTC, Aug 12 2025.
https://www.ftc.gov/news-events/news/press-releases/2025/08/match-group-agrees-pay-14-million-permanently-stop-deceptive-advertising-cancellation-billing“Match Group FT C settlement deceptive advertising”, Fortune, Aug 13 2025.
https://fortune.com/2025/08/13/match-group-ftc-14-million-settlement-deceptive-advertising/“‘Yearners’ Are Sick of Playing It Cool on Dating Apps”, Wired, Jul 8 2025.
https://www.wired.com/story/yearners-are-sick-of-playing-it-cool-on-dating-apps/“Dating apps might be messing with your mental health”, Washington Post, Jun 7 2025. https://www.washingtonpost.com/health/2025/06/07/online-dating-depression-addiction-anxiety/
“One popular dating app is actually 'crushing it' right now”, Business Insider, Aug 6 2025.
https://www.businessinsider.com/hinge-success-match-group-tinder-ceo-spencer-rascoff-dating-apps-2025-8