Mentor Research Institute

Healthy Contracts Legislation; Measurement & Value-Based Payment Contracting; Online Screening & Outcome Measurement Software, The Collapse of Dating and Marriage

503 227-2027

The “Bend Dating” Difference

The Rejection of Tender, Bumble, Hinge, Plenty of Fish & Match

Traditional dating apps make more money by keeping you single.

Bend Dating is the only psychology-informed, evidence-based, community-rooted alternative with independent oversight that is designed to ensure safety, member well-being, and authentic relationships.

Member of Bend Dating have access to a four-tier screening process, from profile verification and psychological screening to background checks and even polygraphs, ensuring honesty, safety, and accountability. Unlike swipe-based apps built on algorithms and gimmicks, Bend Dating is rooted in community, best practices, and independent oversight by a non-profit research institute. Bend Dating is designed for authentic relationships, not games or wasted time.

Bend Dating Design

1. Ethical Standards & Safety

  • Code of Conduct: Enforced rules that promote honesty and respect.

  • Monitored Compliance: Member behavior is actively monitored, investigated, and enforced.

  • Tiered Access System: Four certification levels of screening (1) Profile verification, (2) Psychological screening, (3) Background check, and (4) Polygraph, ensuring every member is real and accountable.

  • No Catfishing / No Ghosting: Structural safeguards against deceptive or disrespectful behavior.

2. Evidence-Based & Professionally Supported

  • Grounded in Best Practices: Screening and member policies are rooted in professional standards of psychology and relationship science.

  • Third-Party Oversight: Independent monitoring by a non-profit research institute guarantees transparency, accountability, and ongoing evaluation of outcomes.

  • Empirical and Evidence-Based Standards: Every practice is grounded in data, not dating fads or untested theories.

  • Professional Referrals: Built-in connections to community counselors, marriage and family therapists, and psychologists.

  • Psychological Screening: Goes beyond surface-level profiles to ensure readiness for genuine relationships.

3. Community-First Approach

  • Local Orientation: Members connect through searchable community activities and event databases.

  • Equal Gender Balance: Commitment to a 50/50 ratio between men and women to prevent imbalance and endless swiping.

  • Real-World Connection: Encourages authentic engagement beyond the screen, rooted in the local community.

4. No Games, No Exploitation

  • No Matching Algorithm: People choose based on genuine interest, not machine-generated scores.

  • No Gamification: No swiping, no streak counters, no addictive mechanics.

  • No Photo Filters: Promotes authenticity and transparency.

  • No exploitative dating motives. (e.g., free food, free entertainment).

  • No Wasting Time: Capped at messaging/interacting with three people at once, ensuring focused, intentional connection.

5. Transparent, Fair, and Honest Pricing

  • No Hidden Costs: No upsells for boosts, super likes, or “unlocking” additional candidates.

  • Straightforward Access: Everyone has equal opportunity, without manipulative monetization strategies.

Top Ranked Traditional Dating Apps

United States

1.  Tinder - The most widely known dating app, famous for its swipe-right/swipe-left interface; primarily geared toward casual dating but also used for relationships

2.  Bumble - A women-first app where only women can message first in heterosexual matches; positioned as more empowering and socially progressive

3.  Hinge - Markets itself as “the dating app designed to be deleted,” encouraging deeper connections through prompts and profiles rather than just photos

4.  Match - One of the earliest online dating sites; focuses on long-term compatibility with a large user base and more traditional matchmaking features

5.  eHarmony - Pioneered algorithm-driven compatibility matching through lengthy questionnaires; marketed as serious, relationship-focused dating

6.  OkCupid - Known for its inclusive approach to sexuality and gender identity; uses detailed questionnaires to generate compatibility scores

7.  Coffee Meets Bagel - Sends users a limited number of curated matches daily, aiming for quality over quantity

8.  Plenty of Fish (POF) - A massive user base in North America; blends casual and serious dating.

9.  Grindr - The leading LGBTQ+ dating app, designed for gay, bi, trans, and queer users; location-based and fast-paced.

10. Coffee Meets Bagel - Sends users a limited number of curated matches daily, aiming for quality over quantity

11. HER - A dating app and community platform for LGBTQ+ women and nonbinary people; blends social networking with dating

Europe (European Union)

1.  Badoo -- One of Europe’s most downloaded apps, especially in Spain, Italy, and Eastern Europe.

2.  Happn - Originated in France; strongest in Paris and other European cities where daily “crossing paths” is common.

3.  Breeze - Gaining traction in the Netherlands and broader Europe by promoting quick offline dates.

4.  Tinder --Still widely used in the UK, Germany, and Nordic countries.

5.   Hinge - Rapidly expanding in the UK and Western Europe, especially among professionals.

6.   Grindr - Extremely popular in European LGBTQ+ communities.

7.   Raya - Exclusive circles in London, Berlin, and other European capitals.

Dating App Behaviors & Mechanisms (Glossary)

1. Swiping

  • What it is: Users swipe right to “like” or left to “pass” on another person’s profile.

  • Why it exists: Quick, addictive decision-making modeled on slot machine psychology.

  • Impact: Reduces people to images, encourages impulsive judgment, and fosters endless browsing rather than commitment.

2. Matching Algorithms

  • What it is: Apps use proprietary formulas to suggest who you “should” meet, often based on activity data, not actual compatibility.

  • Why it exists: Creates the illusion of science-backed matchmaking.

  • Impact: Can feel arbitrary, keeps users dependent on the app instead of their own judgment.

3. Gamification

  • What it is: The use of game-like features (points, badges, leaderboards, streaks) to drive daily use.

  • Why it exists: Boosts engagement and monetization by making dating feel like a game.

  • Impact: Creates addiction-like behaviors, distracts from authentic relationship-building.

4. Streaks

  • What it is: Rewards users for logging in and swiping every day without a break (e.g., “7-day streak!”).

  • Why it exists: Builds habit loops and fear of loss.

  • Impact: Keeps users hooked, not necessarily happy.

5. Ghosting

  • What it is: Cutting off communication suddenly without explanation.

  • Why it exists: Apps make it easy to “disappear” because there’s always another option waiting.

  • Impact: Leaves people feeling rejected, disrespected, and emotionally harmed.

6. Catfishing

  • What it is: Creating fake profiles with false pictures or information.

  • Why it exists: Weak verification standards on many apps.

  • Impact: Betrays trust and can lead to emotional or financial harm.

7. Boosts / Super Likes / Paid Visibility

  • What it is: Paying extra to get your profile shown to more people or to signal special interest.

  • Why it exists: Monetization strategy for apps.

  • Impact: Creates inequality — users who pay get advantages, while others are buried.

8. Free-Meal Dating (“Foodie Calls”)

  • What it is: Using the app to go on dates primarily for free meals or entertainment.

  • Why it exists: Motivated by imbalance of intentions, not serious interest.

  • Impact: Wastes people’s time and creates cynicism about dating.

9. Filtered & Edited Photos

  • What it is: Profiles allow users to post heavily edited or filtered pictures.

  • Why it exists: Users want to look their best; apps don’t restrict it.

  • Impact: Leads to mismatched expectations and lack of authenticity.

10. Endless Messaging

  • What it is: Apps allow unlimited chats without any push toward meeting.

  • Why it exists: More time spent on the app means more ad impressions and upsells.

  • Impact: Creates “textationships” with no real-world connection.

11. Bread-crumbing

  • What it is: Sending occasional flirty messages to keep someone interested without real intent.

  • Why it exists: Easy to keep options open in apps with unlimited access to new people.

  • Impact: Leads to frustration, wasted time, and emotional confusion.

12. Love-Bombing

  • What it is: Excessive affection early on to manipulate or overwhelm.

  • Why it exists: Facilitated by fast-paced app interactions and anonymity.

  • Impact: Can lead to unhealthy or manipulative relationships.

13. Carousel Browsing

  • What it is: An endless feed of profiles (sometimes called “infinite scroll”).

  • Why it exists: Modeled on social media feeds to keep attention.

  • Impact: Creates “paradox of choice” — users never commit because they believe better options are always one swipe away.

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